Friend of Sinners

Good people know their place

and would never touch me,

much less look me in the eye,

probably for fear of contamination.

They speak mostly of me—not to me—

and then, of course, only from a holy distance.

I am a sinner.

In averting their eyes,

they never see me—

never see my awkward hands,

fumbling to grasp their rules;

never see my feet,

passing as close as I dare to the synagogue;

never see my collapsed form,

heaving with sobs of frustration.

I am too condemned even to look at.

I pretend that I am strong,

gripping my basket with both hands

all the way to the market,

but I feel their judgement

scorching like the sun on skin

and going deeper—

burning another hole in my heart.

I will try harder, I vow to myself,

but still—I know it’s no use—

I will never be good enough.

I know what God does to sinners—

He sends floods,

fire and brimstone,

pestilence, disease,


Who are You?

Calling out to me,

running after me,

Your eyes meeting mine,

inviting me to eat.


I do not know You,

and You must not know me—

I am a sinner.

But You know?

…And You came for me…


I drop my basket,

following You through the streets,

unconscious of the stares.

You take me to the others—

sinners gathered around a humble meal.

You sit and eat and talk with us.

Maybe God does have mercy—

I am home.


2 thoughts on “Friend of Sinners

  1. Good morning, Holli, this is beautiful. Speaks right into the heart of all us sinners who fall prey to thinking if we try harder …. Thank you for pointing us to Jesus. Have a blessed day. Love in Christ, Julie

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you. I’m glad it was encouraging to you! I LOVE that God knew we could never be good enough for Him, but He wanted us anyway—so much so that He gave His Son so we could be His forever. It’s a beautiful subject. ❤️

      Liked by 1 person

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